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Read that again, you probably don’t hear it often enough. All marriages have their ups and down, but if one or both spouses have ADHD, the relationship is significantly more challenging.

The statistics are scary and at times you might not believe it’s possible to make a marriage work with ADHD in the mix. Two people, two lives entwined, every day, under one roof…and ADHD.

ADHD is a developmental difference, not a mental illness, and can lead to two sets of symptoms: Inattentiveness, and hyperactivity and impulsiveness.

People with it can mainly struggle with one of these challenges, or have both present at once.

You’re late for appointments, if you even remember that you have them. You say things without thinking or tune out during important conversations. And still, adults with ADHD are completely capable of happy, fulfilling marriages.

It’s complex, it’s hard, it’s beautiful, it’s not impossible. The entwined threads can either be sturdy or frayed.

I’ll forget something or get it wrong or …” “Juuuuust chill out,” he interrupted, patting my knee in a fatherly sort of way. You’re just lazy.” His tone suggested this was a compliment.

For decades ADHD was seen as a young boy’s disorder.The symptoms of ADHD can range from mild to severe, but in many cases the disorder significantly impacts a teen’s ability to function each day.There are three basic subtypes of ADHD: Teens with symptoms of inattention often have a type of ADHD that goes undiagnosed and untreated.They're not as outwardly hyper and distractible, but they still have a lot of trouble focusing, staying on task, and getting things done.They can also be impulsive and feel drawn to active, stimulating activities.If you are willing and ready to strengthen the rope that holds you and your spouse together, you will bring back the warm, cozy feeling you had when you first met. Do you remember the sparks that were flying between you when you looked into each other’s eyes? Leaving the house, finishing projects, and showing up for appointments on time can be stressful for the person with ADHD. Sometimes you can’t even remember where you went, what you did, and who you were with. The trait that drives you crazy is probably the same trait that brings a benefit to your life. Remember your impulsive partner may be the fast-acting doctor, nurse, or EMT who is saving someone’s life.Something about that person made you want to spend the rest of your lives together. In fact, it can be even better than that – a deeper, more mature and profound connection – if you choose to make the effort. Most things couples fight about aren’t worth the effort.Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD, is mainly thought of as something that affects younger children.Sometimes it's still called by its older name - ADD, or Attention Deficit Disorder.They may sit quietly and get along well with others, but struggle to focus and perform at school.Similarly, teens with hyperactive and impulsive forms of ADHD may go undetected because adults assume that they have emotional or behavioral problems. For this reason, teens with ADHD may also exhibit symptoms of other problems, such as anxiety disorders, oppositional defiant disorder, substance abuse and learning disabilities.These days we’re looking at a slightly brighter 3:1.One reason for the discrepancy is that, in girls, the disorder doesn’t always look the way we think it should: fidgety, energetic, distracting.Research shows that teens with ADHD are more than twice as likely to have a car accident as teens without ADHD.They are also more likely to abuse alcohol and other drugs.

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